Boy Suspended for Phone Call from Deployed Dad

A boy is suspended from school for getting a phone call from his dad, who is currently serving in Iraq. A very inflamatory story and one with all the making of sensational news. One poster brought up a good point, though, this article is lacking in definites and is, exactly that, sensational. But it also brings out another concern. When did parents lose the right to parent their children, including contacting them when necessary? People will make mistakes, take advantage of things, and misuse privileges, but regulating every aspect of our lives does only one thing: makes it incredibly difficult for the ones who are doing the right thing.

We make laws and rules on top of laws and rules. Most of them are not matters of ethics or morality, or life and death. Most of these rules are in place simply minimize confusion, to try and keep people safe from their own stupid actions, and to make sure people aren’t abusing the system, a system built, many times, on laws and rules we have made up, laws and rules based on our culture rather than absolute truth.

But what about a case like this one? Despite what some have said about the father being able to call at a different and that the rules are the rules, these rules are not written in stone and we do not know the whole situation. I have many friends who have served and are currently serving in the armed forces. Where you are deployed can have a huge impact on how often you can contact people stateside and how much free time you have. People deployed to higher risk areas get less opportunity to make phone calls and send e-mails. And an e-mail is nothing like getting to hear the person’s voice, especially to a child who has been separated from them for months.

What about parental rights? Do we as parents have a right to be able to contact out children and check in on them at any time? In a school setting, as long as it is not disruptive, such as calling your child everyday just to say hi, I think we certainly do. We are the caregivers, the ones who brought them into the world or gave them a home, and, quite frankly, we should be able to contact our minor children. Schools are there for one reason, to educate.

Now, obviously certain rules have been put in place so that process is not constantly disrupted, but the schools make parental involvement very difficult. Some schools are very good at addressing parental concerns, listening to parental suggestions, applying punishment on a case by case basis, and basically making sure the parent is an integral part of the process. But some schools are not so good at this. They have administrators and teachers who feel they are above the parents and that the parents have no rights once their child enters the school. They have zero tolerance rules that are not always appropriate and often leave the parent out of the loop.

What I really want to know is why public education thinks they should decide our children’s education and our rights without us, the parents, but we are the ones paying for it? We pay for the books, the buildings, the teachers and administrators salaries, and the utilities. We are like a board of investors with no say in how the company is run. They take our money and do what they want. Does anyone else see a problem with this?

And back we come to the story at hand. Is this really about cell phone use in schools or the rights of the parents? Yes, cell phones can be disruptive, but there are other ways to handle situations like this. Suspension seems a bit drastic for one phone call and, if the story is accurate about the father discussing these phone calls with the school before he was deployed, there should have been some predetermined place the boy could have gone to privately take the call. Simply put, the matter should have been handled differently.

Should cell phones be allowed in school, even if just for emergencies? I think this too will depend on the parents. Parents saying I want the right to be able to contact my child directly, with no worry of a lost note from the office or having to go through the school office just to tell my child something as simple as I’ll be late picking you up after school. With the violence in our schools today, this could be an important way for them to keep in touch with us and for them to get help quickly.

But the parents also need to be respectful of why the cell phone rules were inacted and work toward purchasing or creating access to a school friendly phone. One that will not allow the students to text or call their friends during the day and will be strictly used to contact the student and the student to contact their parents and 911. We have the technology, the phones exist, but it requires teamwork on the part of the parents, the students, and the school administrators. In our world of technology, it can be hard to find that proper balance, but but denying parental rights is not the way to do it.